Monday, December 1, 2008

A Thanksgiving to Remember

So what do you get when you cross a bunch of Texans with the British, Irish, a Mexican and a turkey, duck and chicken? You get a Thanksgiving to remember!

This Thanksgiving was a little "different", to say the least. Not "bad" different, just different. I love Thanksgiving. I don't love the fact that my sister is in Italy - and not here - but I still was looking forward to Thanksgiving. I also had a tinge of wishing that my Mom was still here. The last video I have of her is at the Thanksgiving, before she got sick again. I still haven't been able to watch it. It's tucked away in the entertainment center drawer, but I know it's there. And someday, I'll watch it.

Anyway, so....Thanksgiving was spent with my Dad and bonus Mom (BM). And the British, Irish and Texans. What a crew! My BM is the HR director for a cheese factory that is owned by an Irishman. They employ several Irish and British people. So, she invited them for Thanksgiving. She's a native Texan and Thanksgiving was hosted by her best friend, also a Texan. So lots of accents! I've lived in England, my ancestors are Irish, and we border Texas - so I have no problem understanding any of them. My husband, who is Hispanic, couldn't understand half of what any of them said! One of the Irish guys was asking him if they seasoned the turkey or just fried it like it was. Ward couldn't understand what he said. I knew he didn't because he answered him by saying, "MMM Hmmm, yeah." The poor guy just looked at Ward like he had a screw loose! Funny thing is, as the day went on, and the beer and wine started to flow, everyone began to understand each other a little better!

That morning, at 4 am, I helped my BM make the Turducken. For anyone that hasn't heard of this - it's a chicken stuffed inside of a duck, stuffed inside of a turkey - with layers of stuffing between each bird. Didn't sound too difficult. But it was 4 am! In.the.morning.people. For future reference, I will not be making "new" Thanksgiving memories at 4 am. No one should be up at that hour. It makes for a cranky June at 4pm! Anyway, BM had already deboned everything and all we had to do was stuff it and lace it up. That's were the difficult part came in. We squished and stuffed, and scooped and re-stuffed and then tried to lace it up with the lacer that BM had purchased. The package said it was oh-so-easy and came with complete instructions. "Complete instructions" consisted of a picture of these l-shaped hooks with twine laced through them. But the L-shaped hooks were straight on the other end, so every time you tried to tighten the laces, the hooks just slipped back through. Easy, my ass! Frustration was starting to settle in and it would not have been a good idea to have a glass of wine at this point. So....sober, I had to come up with another solution. I just used the hook and threaded the thing up. Stood back and admired our work. It sorta looked like a turkey, with staples in it's chest. Then BM made the comment that we sure could have used my sister's nursing skills. Well, just slap my face why don't you! First of all, she's in Italy, so you're stuck with me. And second of all, she's not a nurse. Yet. Ok? I'm sure she didn't mean to infer that I was completely incompetent, but it was 4 am and I didn't have any wine, so......

We baked that sucker and it came out smelling soooooo good! It didn't come out looking round and plump, but sort of flat and thick. But it smelled so damned good. My mouth was watering. Then we get over to my BM's BFF's house. Her dad, who I'll refer to as "Uncle Bubba", because everyone in Texas has an uncle Bubba. And he was wearing a camouflaged shirt for Thanksgiving, no less! So.....Uncle Bubba offers to carve the Turducken. "Carve" must mean somethin' different over there in Texas. He proceeds to disembowel the thing like it was road kill! No pretty slices of turkey/stuffing/duck/stuffing/chicken/stuffing. Just a pile of "stuff". Oh to hell with it, pass me the wine, will ya' mate?

In all honesty, it was fun. I love my BM. Her friend's family was so nice to all of us. And the British and Irish are extremely funny people! I've never laughed so hard in my life.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I'll tell you later about how two college educated and one semi-college educated adults took two days to make a call to Italy to talk the nurse-to-be!


Kat said...

I should be taking some sort of offense here but this was too damn funny to get my airs up... Glad you had a great one!

Tracie said...

I think you should have just had the wine! Some people are still drinking at that time of the morning so why should'nt you have started?! I'm just saying

Shana said...

We had a TurDucken last Thanksgiving. It was yummy!
Sounds like a funfun time.

Becca said...

Sounds like you had a great Thanksgiving!

Erin said...

Okay, two things. First, don't lie to us. I know, and anyone who is truly your friend knows that you DID have the wine at 4 a.m. Please, stop the trying to paint the "oh I'm so good and strong" picture!

Second...thank you very much for reminding me that I am NOT a nurse. Think I don't know that already??? Hmm? Well, ya I do. Okay. I'm glad I wasn't there because you would of made that comment and I would of gotten my feeling hurt and stormed off to my room to cry.

And third, ya, I'm throwig an extra one in here....For the last time you can buy one of those thurkeyduckgoatcowrooster things from Cabellas or The Bass Pro Shop. But just like the green bean casserol, it's very 1990ish.

Okay, I feel better. Have a supurb day!

Jeankfl said...

I agree with Erin.. I know you were sneakin' sips (or gulps) of Sounds like a wonderful, hilarious day! Is every holiday with you like this?? LOL