Thursday, January 22, 2009

Excuse me while I curl up into a ball.....

 

This post was turning out to be one of whiniest in history - even for me. The resident bitch whiner.  So, I hit the backspace key and deleted the whole thing!  Because I can.  Because this blog is MINE.  It is probably the only thing in my life that I am in total control of.  Everything else?  In my life? Absolutely no control over.  None.  Zip.  I don't know when I lost control, or if I ever really had it.  I'm sure, at some point, it was at least manageable.  Wasn't it?  I seem to remember a time when life was manageable. 

 

It isn't even the fact that I want to be in total control.  Because I don't.  In fact, nothing would make me happier than for someone else to be in control and just tell me how the hell I'm supposed to make this shit work.  I would like the responsibility of taking care of EVERYTHING to be someone else's.  That would suit me just fine.

 

No more appointments to make.  Appointments to remember to go to.  Or remember to take your kids to. No more dealing with stupidity.  (Why would you order a blackberry when you can't even manage to change a roll of toilet paper by yourself?) Not having to worry about bills to pay.  No more having to plan for dinner in the morning.  Do I have canned tomatoes?  Did I tell the boys I loved them enough today?  Enough to keep them from turning out like some of those other kids have - even though those kids also had parents that loved them? Not having to go online and check your checking account balance.  That's someone else's responsibility.  Not having to worry if there's enough money for college. No more worrying that it's still 4 days til payday and you've already dipped into your reserves by $300!    No trying to figure out how to pay for vacation now, when your bonus isn't until April. No worrying what you will do if you don't get a bonus this year.  Not having to wait 5 months to have my hair done, because there's money there to do it. And if there's not?  Well someone else will have to go without. 

 

Well, it looks like this has turned out whiney anyway.  Tough shit.  I'm stressed.  I'm tired.  I'm done. 

 

Somehow, it will all work out in the end. 

13 comments:

Lucky Wife/Bookaholic said...

Wait... Do you have my phone bugged? Beacuse I just had this exact conversation today... Only lots and lots of tears and snot. I let my 11 year old cut my hair... scary huh?

Tracie said...

when you find whoever to take your's, i've got a few things I would like to get rid of too!

K said...

It's your blog and you can whine if you want to.

I hope all goes well and that you don't have too much stupidity to deal with this weekend.

Belle said...

Did you know that George Clooney is coming to take me away? He told me so himself. I met him in a special place they took me to last time I let things take control of me.

Jane! said...

I would totally send you a box of wine if I didn't live in You-tah. I think it's a felony. Or maybe I just can't GET wine sent to me. Who knows but you could be in worse shape.... you could be caught in the liquor law hell here behind the Zion curtain.

Chin up, chica! Don't let the bastahds get you down!!!

Shana said...

Whine away!!!

BBB said...

I say if you can't whine here, what's the point of having your own blog?? Whine away!!

I hope things get better June! Your blog buds love ya, whine and all!!

Becca said...

Whine away, you are entitled to! Hugs to you, I hope that things get better soon!

Pat said...

Sorry I am so late posting here. Like you said this is your blog, so whine, bitch, yell, scream all that you need to do to survive.
I've been whineing for a week, just haven't posted about it yet. It contains puke and poop!!! Yikes. Hugs, Pat

Kat said...

You want some cheese with that? Have you ever thought of just throwing in the white towel and telling those boys you quit? Ya, me too, didn't work so don't bother...

Mayberry Magpie said...

Somehow it does all work out in the end. We fancy we're in control, that we take "responsibility" for everything, but it works out even if we slip.

That's what I keep telling myself, too, sister.

Anonymous said...

I have been in these same shoes. Anybody but me, please.

It gets better. Or so I've heard.

xoxo
Dana

Pat said...

Just stopping by to check on you. Hope all is ok?? Miss you, Hugs, Pat