Friday, August 14, 2009

My new mantra

 

Pink Naked Yoga Room.  Pink Naked Yoga Room.   PINK NAKED YOGA ROOM!!

 

I said this over and over in my head this morning - as I sat in the parking lot at work with tears running down my face.  It didn't help that Rob Thomas' "Here Diamonds" was playing.  As this starts playing...

Oh what the hell she said,
I just can't win for losing,
And she lays back down,
Man there's so many times,
I don't know what I'm doing,
Like I don't know now.

....and those tears just started rolling.  And then I thought "Pink Naked Yoga Room" and started to laugh.  So there I am, mascara running down my face and laughing.  My coworkers think I have truly, finally lost my mind!

 

Before you think, "Good God woman! Kids leave for college every day"  well, it's not just that.  If I only had to deal with that right now, I'd be shaky, but ok.  It's all the other day to day crap that's piled underneath that has to be dealt with too.  Sometimes....it's just too much. 

 

So.....Pink Naked Yoga Room.   Pink Naked Yoga Room!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Conspiracy theory

 

Here's the conversation I imagine my boys must have had.....

 

Wally:  Hey Beav, you know how Mom is starting to lose her mind and all that.  You know, on account of how I'm headed off to college and all...

 

Beav: Yeah, Wally?  Why do you have to go and do a thing like that?  You know Mom isn't too stable as it is.  Why didn't you just stay home and get your basics here?  Or work at McDonald's or somethin'? Huh, Wally?

 

Wally:  Beav, I've got a plan. 

 

Beav:  Really?

 

Wally:  Yeah, how about you go out for for football this year.  Mom will be so freaked out about that, she probably won't notice that I'm even gone.....

 

Beav:  Well, but Wally, last time I played....well, they broke my arm.  Remember?

 

Wally:  Beav, you gonna be the baby your whole life? 

 

Beav:  Ok, Wally.  I'll do it....

 

 

Cut to last night, when Beaver brings his helmet home and Wally walks in with the totes he needs to pack his stuff for college.  See June?  That's her right there.  Headed to Hellmart for more wine.  Little stock tip - I'd suggest y'all buy some shares of Franzia, because their profits are sure to increase this year!  You can thank me later.  But for now.....I need you.  I really need you!  (Jane!Dammit, this is no time for you to go AWOL - or any of the rest of you for that matter!)